Tag: Summer Reading

Books · Quotes

A Life Lesson from Edith Wharton

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I finally finished House of Mirth from my summer reading list. I wanted to abandon it several times, but it felt like cheating to not to read any of the classics off the list. I tried to read Lady Chatterly’s Lover several years ago on the beach in Aruba. Needless to say that was a bust.

Anyway, it took me over a month to get through it. I have to admit I didn’t love the book. I liked Age of Innocence much better, which isn’t hard to believe since it won the Pulitzer Prize in 1921. Nonetheless, I kept reading House of Mirth becauseWharton’s fictional world of wealthy New Yorkers reminded me of the contemporary struggles between upper and middle class. Unfortunately, in today’s world your socio-economic level can effect more than how you’re viewed in society or what party you’re invited to. It can mean losing your job while the CEO continues to be paid 231 times more than the average employee [“Are they worth it?” The Economist]. Wharton’s commentary on self-indulgence is as relevant today as it was in 1905.

But the most profound message from the book came from the following quote:

Miss Farrish could see no hope for her friend [Lily Bart, the protagonist] but in a life completely reorganized and detached from its old associations; whereas all Lily’s energies were centered on the determined effort to hold fast to those associations, to keep herself visibly identified with them, as long as the illusion could be maintained.

 

Lily Bart had been exiled from her familiar world of indulgent wealth, because many believed that she had an affair with a wealthy man. And though she didn’t enjoy interacting with the people who belonged to that world, she couldn’t let go. Her own identity was too closely tied to the perceptions of other people and the trappings of wealth. Letting go would have meant giving up who she thought she was. So she continued to strive for the life she thought she should have rather than the one that had the possibility of affording real happiness and love.

It reminds me of a picture I once saw on Facebook with two circles: one labeled “Your comfort zone” and the other labeled “Where the magic happens.” Lily’s behavior is much like our own when we are unwilling to a take a risk because it involves letting go of our perceptions of ourself. Sometimes detaching from “old associations” and reorganizing our lives is the very thing we need improve our circumstances. But instead, we use our energy to maintain the illusion of being satisfied with the status quo.

It happens to me more times than I care to admit. I resist some change because I’m afraid I might lose the comfort of the status quo. I spend way too much energy trying to maintain the illusion of who I think people think I am. the But defining one’s self by the perception of other is the very thing that drove Lily to her tragic end.

House of Mirth has stood the test of time because it speaks to the universal truth that It doesn’t matter what other people think. We each have to live our own lives.

 

 

Books

Summer Reading List

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Call me weird, but I get excited when my daughter brings home her summer reading list. I can’t wait to see which books the teachers selected. And I feel a certain vindication when one of my favorites makes the cut.

I’m always tempted to read one of the books on the list as a way to connect with my daughter. But after the Twilight mother-daughter book club debacle – I read all four books and she decided after the first one they were too boring – I realized she doesn’t share my enthusiasm for reading. Not to mention the fact that most of the books on her list get read two weeks before school starts in a rush mode that doesn’t invite much conversation. So this year I’ve decided to create my own summer reading list.

Last weekend I read through the New York Times book section for ideas, but nothing jumped out at me. I almost abandoned the idea, but then it occurred to me that my daughter’s list had a plan behind it. The teachers develop the list as a gateway to the coming school year. It’s designed to engage the mind and challenges thinking.  Of course the planning and foresight is often lost on high school students, but the premise of using the lazy days of summer to contemplate new ideas is inspiring.

So here is The Confident Writer’s summer reading list to nurture our inner writer. The list focuses more on categories than specific books. If the books listed don’t interest you, pick another one. The idea is to challenge your thinking and enrich your craft.   Read one from each category or pick your favorites.   Here’s the list:

  • A classic. I know there is some debate about what actually constitutes a classic, butthat doesn’t really matter for our purposes. What’s important is reading somethingthat has stood the test of time. I plan to read either House of Mirth (Edith Wharton) or Lady Chatterley’s Lover (D. H. Lawrence). My only motivation for choosing these two books is that they are both currently on my bookshelf unread.


  • A book on craft. The summer is the perfect time to commit to reading an instructional book, because we are more open to try new ideas. And though this blog is about writing, there are craft books for whatever you like to do. I plan to read either Turning Life into Fiction (Robin Hemley) or Writers and Their Notebooks (Diana Raab).

    • A collection of stories or essays. I’ve been dabbling in this genre with my own writing so I need to read more of it. I’m particularly interested pieces about relationships between men and women as well as suburbia. The nice thing about reading a collection is that you can read it in tiny snippets. My two picks are either How to Be Alone (Jonathan Franzen) or Eleven Kinds of Loneliness (Richard Yates).

Can you think of other books or categories that would be good to add to the list?  It’ll be fun to see what everyone is interested in. Share what you’re planning to read this summer.

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